Thursday, October 19, 2006
This survey is for girls! Current mood: ditzy
1. Someone knocks on your door at 2 a.m., who do you want it to be?
Someone with a good fucking excuse.
2. Your boss tells you he/she will give you a $20 raise if you'll do your job naked, do you stay
and take the raise?
Twenty bucks an hour? Sure. Twenty bucks a year? Sure. Do I do my job naked now? Yup.
3. Put yourself in a nutshell:
Fuck you.
4. Ever seen a ghost?
Only abductees see ghosts.
5. Happy with your body?
Suck my cock.
6. A reason you would move to Iceland:
A. Because someone put a gun to my head.
B. Because someone paid me an inordinate amount of money.
C. To fuck Bjork.
7. A place you've lived that you miss:
I lived in Amsterdam for ten days. I miss the shit out of it.
8. A job you would never do, no matter how much you were paid:
Military.
9. A band/group you thought was cool when you were 13:
Stone temple pilots. They suck balls.
10. You have a nightmare, who's the first person you think to call?
No one, what am I, a pussy? Fuck you for asking that.
11. Wanna have kids before you're 30?
Nah, even if it means they'll be fucking retards.
12. A memory from high school:
I got suspended and I hate various teachers and headmasters. Earl J Ball III, Doc Coleman, Mr. Franek.
13. Ever had a crush on one of your friend's parents?
Not really.
14. Naughtiest thing you've done at work:
Myspace surveys.
15. Do you look more like your mom, or your dad?
I look like a combination of the two, you fucking idiot.
16. Something you've always wanted to learn how to do:
Become a killing machine.
17. Still friends with your exes?
Only the ones that don't hate me. Which is none of them.
18. Where you'd like to be in 10 years:
Named the world's #1 hobo-murderer.
19. Something you learned about yourself this year:
I have medical problems.
20. What do you want for your birthday?
Happiness and anal sex.
1. NAME THREE THINGS YOU DID TODAY?1) Woke up.2) Came to work.3) Took an enormous dump.
2. LAST ITEM YOU BOUGHT YOURSELF.
Weed.
3. DO U HAVE AN ORNAMENT HANGING FROM UR REARVIEW MIRROR?
I don't have a car, you fuck ass.
4.WHAT DID YOU HAVE FOR BREAKFAST?
Coffee.
5. NAME A CELEB YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON:
Christina Fucking Ricci. I want to fuck her until she pukes.
6. NAME THE LAST THREE BANDS YOU SAW LIVE?
Radiohead, and some shitty friend's bands.
7. HOW MANY HOURS OF SLEEP DO YOU GET A NIGHT?
Seven to eight.
8. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TIED UP?
By terrorists. I escaped and killed them all.
9. WHAT DO YOU WISH YOU WERE DOING RIGHT NOW?
Sleeping, skiing, sailing, or being in Amsterdam.
10. WHOS THE FIRST PERSON IN UR PHONE BOOK ON UR CELL?
This random bitch I never fucked.
11. LAST TIME YOU WITNESSED A FIGHT?
When that strong hobo was struggling with me last night. Didn't help him out that much though.
13. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HAIR PULLED?
I'm a fucking dude, you idiot.
14. NAME THREE PLACES YOU WOULD LIKE TO TRAVEL TO:1) Amsterdam2) Japan3) Australia
15. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO ICE SKATE?
I can get by, but it's not something I specialize in. Oh yeah, fuck you!
17. NAME SOMETHING THAT YOU LIKE THATS OUT OF THE ORDINARY?
People shitting in my mouth. And hobo-murder.
18. IS BIGGER REALLY BETTER?
No! Shut up!
19. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF BRAD PITT?
He's a hot piece of man-ass.
20. Name a friend you have the most in common with?
What the fuck do you care?
21. WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR TOENAILS?
Goddamnit, this is a fucking girl's survey, isn't it?
22. Last person you talked with on the phone?
This schizophrenic guy.
23. DO YOU OWN ANYTHING WITH A SKULL ON IT?
Yeah, my skeleton.
24. HAVE YOU TRAVELED TO EUROPE?
Yuppers. Amster-fucking-dam.
25. NAME THREE PEOPLE YOU WOULD TRUST WITH YOUR LIFE?
Jack Bauer, Spider-man, Bill Clinton.
26. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
The Departed. It was so good, I shat myself.
27. WHERE WERE YOU WHEN YOU HAD YOUR FIRST KISS?
A good friend's backyard with a slutty Spanish exchange student.
29. LAST BOARD GAME YOU PLAYED?
Something dumb
30. LEATHER OR LACE?
Suck my balls.
31. EVER HAD A BLACK EYE?
I gave myself one by accident on Nov. 2nd 2004. I was opening a wine bottle.
32. WHERE DO YOU RENT YOUR MOVIES
On demand.
33. HAVE YOU EVER WORN FISH NET STOCKINGS?
Goddamnit.
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